At the castle

Fireplace, the Hobbit, gingercookies and hot milk

2008-11-27T07:50:00.008+01:00

Winter time, candle time.
My reading room is my safe haven at winter time.
With candles and an open fireplace giving the room it´s warm atmosphere.

I love my reading room.

It´s not really finished yet, but almost.
It took about one and a half year before it was done.

The whole project just froze in the very begining, as my heart froze.
Now, time does not heal all wounds, not at all.
Time just passes so that acceptance of the loss or the damage you recived can sink into your mind and soul and give room for acceptance.
And as acceptance becomes part of your reality, life is easier to embrace, again.

So, i just finished my reading room, embracing life, once more.

I am reading "the Hobbit" again.
Not because I am a fanatic Tolkienist, almost the other way around, due to the fact that I have worked with games and fantasy for about 24 years and I just can´t stand all the fanatic nerds and Tolkien society people that I have meet over the years. They all tend to drag things of beauty into the dirt.

Still, I love the introduction of "the Hobbit".
As the dwarfs show up, in waves, filling Bilbos so pitouresque home and testing he´s patient and hospitality to the limit, I always find myself smilling. I love that part.
It´s ingenious in all it´s small details and semingly pointless series of events.
I will probably just read that part, then leave the book for something else.
I have done that many times already.

Now it is time for hotmilk and gingercookies.
I love my reading room.
I admit it, I wish it was part of a hobbit home as well.

Winter and "the Wind in the Willows”

2008-11-23T11:47:00.004+01:00

So it´s winter again.
Even though winters do not look the same as they used to do.
They don’t even feel the same.With less snow, less cold and bitter winter storms.
Still the days are short, the nights filled with stars and the evenings are made for good books, hot tea and cuddling up in the reading room.

I am enjoying rereading “the Wind in the Willows”.
How many times have I read it by now?
Why can I read it time and time again?
I do not honestly know.

Maybe it just captures all the romantic flavors of a world that really cannot exist.
A world where real troubles are far away and where the most complicated trouble is to keep Toad from driving a car, any car.

I am in love with this universe of talking furry animals, endless picnics and small boats rowing at the riverside towards the next perfect spot for a cup of tea in a make belive brittish dreamlanscape.

Now I am going for my next cup, of great tea.

Authum and Tea, again

2008-10-19T10:26:00.005+02:00

Authum, once again.

Funny how I dont write anything during the summer.
Was it love, or lack of love, or just the summer itself that held back my writings.

Bulgakow and breath taking sunsets

2008-06-11T12:25:00.005+02:00

These are the days of hot evenings and spectacular sunsets.

As I was having a cup of good tea, re-reading "The Master and Margarita" last evening
(one of the few books really worth to re-read time and time again) , I saw the sky lit up. The clouds were burning by the sea and the top of the trees were glowing.
I felt like if I just woke up from a dream.

I hurled myslef down to get a glimps and to get a picture of what I could capture of the magic.
When I came to the old pier I could also see how the sea was burning as well.

I am not a good photographer, and I was not able to capture the colours or the intensity.

Still one can sense the magic and the atmosphere from this photo.

Bird Island

2008-05-24T10:28:00.006+02:00

I am living in a dream world.

Not far from my old house there is a little bird lake, with small islands where the birds nest.
Every year there are hundreds and hundreds of geese ducklings hatched here and the lakes are soon to be full of small swimming birds.
I just love to see these small descendants of the dinosaurs as they swim and make their childish noises.

When life is young, in it’s spring, is the most beautiful stage of life.
It makes us humble to look at.

Robert A. Heinlein
"If the universe has any purpose more important then topping a woman you love and making a baby with her, hearty help, I have never heard of it."

Fox Rain Clouds

2008-04-14T21:31:00.005+02:00

They say in Japan that when rain falls as the sun shines, there will be a marriage. A marriage between foxes. Therefore it is called "Fox Rain".

Due to the nature of the fox, being a shape shifter, able to transform in between it´s fox harbour into human form, a fox marriage is considered a very magical and mysterious one.
It is not to be seen by humans.

If ever you would stumble across the foxes marching gently to the marriage, be sure to run, or you migth end up in their realm forever.. or even worse.

Today it was a true fox rain.
These are some of the pictures I took as the rain ended.

Fox rain clouds are mesmerizing.
Truly the work of magic.

Rejection and Progress

2008-04-12T10:06:00.018+02:00

" In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected
thoughts;
they come back to us with a
certain alienated majesty. "
/ Ralph
Waldo Emerson

Life is about being rejected.
Time and time again.

It´s about rejected by parents, school, talent agents, friends and foes, bartenders, doorkeepers, buss drivers and hotel clerks, publishing houses, girl or boyfriends, potential girl or boyfriends, company leaders, politicians, city councils, school boards.. well all kinds of boards and authority's.

Just remember that the rejection does not define you, your talent or your life, your future or your hopes. Never accept rejection to be the "truth".
Just go on. Leap again and again.
Leap and the net will appear.
If it did not.. you just did not leap from a point high enough and towards a goal impossible enough.

"You have to know how to accept rejection and reject
acceptance. "
/ Ray Bradbury, advice to writers

Rejection is what makes us grow.
It makes us find new ways and look upon life through new angles.
It gives us opportunities to find new paths that would never appear otherwise.
Look upon it as a gift.
Enjoy every single rejection.
Enjoy it even in times of pain.
Never let it define you.

Always remember:
Love is law.
You are a living descendant of God.

"Every great advance
in natural knowledge has involved the absolute rejection of authority."
/ Thomas H. Huxley (1825 - 1895)

Dreamland and Pillarbed

2008-04-07T22:35:00.006+02:00

I always loved the pillarbeds of the silver screen as they appeared in agent movies, adventure films and romantic dramas.

I always wanted one myself.
And after reading Von Götha, Frollo and other masters of the sensual and burlesque literature that feeling just got stronger.
I just could not resist when I saw the silver bed at the store.
It had my name written on it.
So now I read the Von Götha albums in my bed of silver pillars on my way to dreamland.

Reflections on love

2008-03-28T22:47:00.006+01:00

"The unexamined life is not worth living!"
/ Socrates, in Plato, Dialogues, Apology

Love has a value that is impossible to measure or see with the eye or intellect.
It´s value is only known within the person or animal, spirit or plant, that is part of love.
To know the value of your love, think of it as lost.
Imagine it as lost from you, forever.
Then, as tears comes to your eyes,
You will know your loves true value.
You will know.

Ghostseeds

2008-03-24T20:44:00.007+01:00

Its ironic, or typical, that mankind, people, always tries to change the world around them, people around them.

Very very few honestly thinks about to change them self.
Even lesser goes through that process.
So few of us humans have realized that it is within our own reach to create our own universe and personality.

The ghost within,
.. is within reach.

Create yourself.

Tree and Pole

2008-03-23T22:29:00.028+01:00

Sometimes I just have to stop the car,

and get out, just to be able to stand there and admire.

How beautiful the nature can be, and how much beauty there is in the interaction as the humans build and form the landscapes.
We build dams and water reservoirs that becomes gigantic natural mirrors, raise poles for the telecommunication and electricity to travel through, creates farmlands and we construct roads that curves through the landscapes.

It all becomes a symphony of eye candy that brings the soul into harmony.

Even junk, a fallen electric pole, piles of trashed houses and cars and pieces from unknown man made objects becomes beautiful landscape art as time passes by.

And in the far away, a 1000 year old church.

It´s a godlike poetry of forms, the light and sound, as the sun peaks through the clouds and the wind sweeps through the fields.

I love it.

I am totally addicted to it.

I am in love with the greatness and the beauty of the landscape that is shaped this way.

Deers and wall plaster

2008-03-19T20:29:00.008+01:00

It´s winter again.
For a day or two.

I am walking a lot these days.
Taking photos, thinking and just embraceing these flickering moments.

Soon I will be done with the walls in the hallway.
I really long for the plaster and paint jobb to be done so I can start creating the new enviroment that I have sketched for this section of the old house.

Yukimi-gata

2008-03-17T22:25:00.002+01:00

This evening as I came home long after sundown, I made a snow latern from the new fallen snow.

It´s still lit outside my doorways, to guide and bring a smile to wandering neigbours and friends passing my house.

I wounder what is more strange or scary, the summer sunsets of the past days, or the reapearing of the winter?
Global warming or just strange days indeed?

Hello and Goodbye

2008-03-16T19:32:00.005+01:00

Sunsets.

Why do I never grow borred of sunsets?

Maybe it is becuase they remind us, me, of life itself.
It is as if the sun, in it´s last minutes before decending beyond the horizon, gives out burts of magic and ligth the same way a human marked by death sometimes do.

Knowing that this is the last moment of life, often makes us enjoy it so much more.
Suddenly the things that we once found important loses its importance, and everything from the small details to the big picture twists and turns, and we start loving the things that are of real importance.

Maybe that is why I still get a tear in my eye at every sunset I find myself looking into.

I am a romantic fool.

------------------

"The story Of life is quicker
Than the wink of an eye
The story of love
Is hello and goodbye
Until we meet again"

/ James Marshall Hendrix

( he´s last poem and writen words acording to the legend, just hours before death )

Late winter sunset

2008-03-15T22:54:00.000+01:00

These are strange days.
It should be ice and winter at this time of the year. Instead the evenings here at the castle are like later summer nigths.
This evening was totaly magic.
Deep blue skies and waters bid farwell of the day as the sun set and the moon rose in the east.

Wolfs journey and the seeds of Ghostplants

2008-03-13T10:23:00.000+01:00

For reasons that are bound to the open web of destinys many pathways and crossroads, I have started a journey, a life odyssey, towards goals to me unknown.

It all started as I moved from the city core, to a far away little village.

This I did to live a life with the one I loved.
As faith took us on a ride, She did not have love in her heart, not at all.
There lived only betrayal of what once was our love, my love and my good will.

So now I live in the village, Or to be more specific, even outside that villlage, where the concrete road turns to a small curvy mud road, nearby the castle and the deers.
Out here, far away from the city I loved, far from the one and the ones I love, I live the life I always wanted to live.

Strange enough.

Life is everchanging.

Don´t look back.

Spirit travel and the old hen house

2008-03-07T00:04:00.000+01:00

I love to travel while not moving.

My mind stretches out, becomes an entity of its own, finds it´s own path.
It´s the journey of the shaman.

I truly do not know how I do it.
Why I can reach out and travel this way I do not understand either.
Still..I love the sensation, the rush,when I reach out and my spirit starts to wander off.

I seldom reach that stage, but it happens every now and then.
Last time it was not in a state of meditation but in a state where my body and mind where worn out of exhaustion and grief.

It was so intense that my mind and body got separated.
I stod in the rain, outside my house, after hours of work, carrying heavy wooden logs.
I was about go down on my knees due to exhaustion.
Then suddenly my chest opened up in a flash of white light, and my spirit ran towards the skies.
It was like a pillar of clear blue white light that stood out of my body in a straight line towards the heavens.

I could see myself, standing on my knees with my arms spread out, as if embracing the universe itself.

And I heard a voice speaking.
Once again I received one more piece of the great pussle.

-------------------------------------------------------

Soon I will start rebuilding the old hen house.
It will become my mediation chamber, my house of spirit travel.

Hen house of traveling spirits.

A day at the castle

2008-03-06T23:42:00.000+01:00

"Leap and the net will apear."

These words are sacred.
Cause they are all true.

Leap and the net will apear.

It will.